inspiring day turned upside down

Just when I think I am getting a hang of the life here in Uganda, the ‘pearl of Africa’ takes me by surprise, once again.  I’ve been watching the Ugandan news (whenever there was power) and flipping through newspapers throughout the past 2 months that I’ve been here, with a growing sense of uncertainty about this world we live in.  Tunisian and Egyptian revolutions, now Libya in a civil war, Japan, and then dozens of Middle Eastern countries beginning their own anti-government protests.  With a history full of war, corruption, and instability, I now don’t know why I doubted that Uganda could be next.

 Months before I left for Uganda, I was told repeatedly, time and time again by family, by friends, by professors, by random people who I didn’t even know, “you want to go to Uganda?! Why? Youre crazy. I mean, that’s awesome, but still, youre crazy”, “be careful over there…” and “be safe”.  By my last month in America, I was so sick of hearing it, to be honest.  I just wanted to go. I knew how to be safe; I can take care of myself. I can handle Uganda. I felt that so many people doubted me, and I hated that.  Far too often, I think I can handle way more than I can carry.  I think I’ve always been like this. So when I felt like people couldn’t see me surviving Uganda, it got me upset.  

After this past week, I finally understand… I get it now. I may have been able to ‘handle’ Uganda thus far (minus a few scars from a boda boda accident, getting lost in Kampala too many times to count, a stolen booklight from my backpack and a few bad sunburns) but Uganda has its own unpredicted agenda.  I now feel like I cannot fully protect myself, I feel a little out of control.  Never in my life have I been so thankful for the rights and freedom we have in America.  

So depending on where you read your news, you may not have heard what has been happening in Uganda (gov’t of Uganda literally blocked gulu protests from being published from BBC) But Uganda has exploded this past week with protests. 

Last Wednesday, I’m thanking God for giving me that gut feeling to leave Kampala and travel to Gulu for my research project. So far, I have loved everything about Gulu.

And not even 24 hours later, Gulu turns on me.  At 5oclock on Thursday evening, protests broke out in Gulu’s city center.  Countrywide, Ugandans have begun the walk-to-work demonstration to protest the high fuel and food prices…and police have began arresting people for participating—for WALKING—and shooting bullets, setting off teargas, and caning people left and right.

So where was I during all of this? My adviser, Raphael, and I were out conducting field work in Awach sub-county.  It was an incredible day, visiting IDP and satellite camps in the bush. I felt so inspired by these strong Ugandans surviving the war and trying to rebuild their lives.  I could write so much about this day-and I will-but let me stick to the protests for now... 

I spent the whole day in the bush with no access to phone reception, no news, no power. we arrive back into town at my hotel that gracie and i are staying at. i offered to help raphael type an application for him. but of course, power is gone and my laptops dead so we decide to go into town to a place with a generator on. on our way there in his car (it only takes 3 minutes in car to get into town center, we were about halfway there), we spot gracie on a boda boda and shes flailing her arms for us to stop. gracie was just at this free wifi coffee shop when gun shots fired off RIGHT before she stepped outside to leave to meet me back at the hotel. the workers grabbed her and everyone in the place hid inside the cafe. the gun shots (im pretty sure) were NOT aimed at anyone, the police were trying to control protesters by shooting in the air (later found out that 3 died). Everyone was on the ground outside to protect themselves. 

view from our hotel during protests 

so raphael gracie and i zoomed back to our hotel where we stayed the rest of the evening...well over 100 gunshots were fired by police (and then soldiers) to scare the protesters. gulu city center is pretty small so we heard every shot. the town was full of smoke, full of teargas.

people were literally getting caned right outside our hotel and soldiers were just shooting the sky. ive never heard a gunshot besides movies, it was so eerie. gracie was literally like "omggg this is amazing! can you believe we are here in the middle of this violent protest! Ahhh so exciting!". shes freaking out with excitement while im like in tears terrified haha go figure. love gracie but we are sooo different when in these situations

It was so frustrating because the power was out, laptops dead, gracies phone was about to die, our academic adviser, Charlotte, couldn’t get a hold of us. I can’t begin to explain how thankful I am that we have reliable electricity in America…

The results of these Ugandan demonstrations?  As of right now, 4 are killed, one presidential opposition, Besigye, shot and arrested, the other 2 presidential oppositions, Mao and Otunno arrested, one man lynched in Gulu for wearing a pro-Museveni tshirt , and the list goes on and on. The walk-to-work protests are supposed to take place Mondays and Thursdays. Yesterday there were police and soldiers on every single corner.  

It’s amazing how quickly things can happen, how things can change.  I love this place.  I just hate this feeling of insecurity, of not knowing what will happen tomorrow.

The staff at my hotel was trying to calm me down as I’m shaking in the corner last Thursday (while Gracie is jumping excitedly that we are experiencing part of history).  One of the workers, Simba, (who has become a good good friend and early morning running buddy) tried to explain to me that ‘these things happen in Uganda. Tonight it is crazy, tomorrow will be a new day’ . That’s reassuring.   But I didn’t really put things in his perspective, in the eye’s of someone who has lived in Gulu their entire life.  Simba and the rest of Gulu has just experienced a 22-year war where abductions, invasions, killings, and rape happened on a daily basis. Of course these ‘little’ protests weren’t that big of a deal.  I’ll never forget Simba’s voice as he kept telling me, “do not fearaaah, carol”

the part that im struggling with the most right now is not whether or not i agree with what these protesters are fighting for, but im struggling with how unstable and up in the air everything is here right now.  I am worried for my safety, but I am proud of these ugandans for fighting for what they believe in.  if they are fighting against the ridiculously high inflation prices, i get it.  after living here for just over 2 months, ive met too many ugandans who already struggle, day after day, to make a few shillings to feed their spouse, their children, themselves. and they barely survive. its insane. i understand why they would take a stand. im just worried. and i miss home. 

updates on walk-to-work demonstration

A beautiful calm, cool night in Gulu yet I am feeling restless

So here I am in Gulu for the rest of my program with the wonderful, lively, bubbly, free-spirited Gracie—also a curly haired, ginger with the last name of BURGER.  she’s a riot. Not to mention she’s studying prisons in Uganda, which is fascinating. I’m so happy shes here in Gulu with me.

A lot has happened since my last entry. Instead of working for an NGO, I am solely doing research on the impact the government and NGOs are making on water provision in the post-conflict zone of the Gulu District in northern Uganda.  

The past two days have been emotionally exhausting and physically draining.  My new adviser, Raphael, has been nothing but wonderful for helping me with my research…it is just that these days have taken so much out of me.  The heat, the sun, the flies, the mosquitoes, the dust.  Not only did I get SO sunburned being outside all day, but the intense sun and constant heat took a toll on me.  God, I am so weak, I feel so awful because here I am complaining about how I can barely handle two days on these field visits when these are the conditions these warm, welcoming and self-less people live in every. Single. Day.

 

Raphael and I drove all day to four sub-counties within the Gulu District yesterday (Pece, Koro, Laroo and Bar-dege)to observe the different types of water sources (bore holes, protected springs, shallow wells, hand-dug wells, motorized solar panel pumps, unprotected springs, etc) and to interview district officials and the primary respondents—the beneficiaries using the water in these rural areas.  It was so interesting to hear from some of the officials about what they say they are doing to improve the accessibility to clean water and sanitation in these rural communities…and then talk to the actual people living in these villages and seeing firsthand these ‘improvements’ of these water sources, or lack thereof. The water points we visited are awful. 

memorial futball stadium-our view from our hotel room, our home for the next month

But I am really struggling with doing this research right now.  When Ugandans spot us ‘mazungus’, they instantly assume that we have money.  When I show up to some of these water sources looking to conduct a few interviews, many times the villagers are hopeful that I have arrived in their village to give them funds to build/repair a new well simply because im white. I understand research is helpful in many ways, but it is difficult to leave these places without feeling completely terrible for not doing something more.

Throughout the 20 years that northern Ugandan was in this civil war, so many NGOs flooded Gulu for assistance.  Yet now that the war has ended, the majority of NGOs have left to find other emergency areas like congo, southern sudan, etc.  So that leaves a huge challenge for the people living in Gulu who have heavily relied on these NGOs that now have to fend for themselves.  Many of the NGOs during the conflict came in, drilled boreholes, and left.  Now many of these boreholes are broken and pump dirty water because both the government and NGOs did not efficiently train the community members on proper maintenance.  What’s the point of spending thousands of dollars drilling these water points when they end up breaking and no one knows how to repair them? It’s just frustrating.  

It amazes me how strong these women and children are.  The last sub-county that we went to, Bar-dege, was really difficult to see.  The one water source was a protected spring.  (note: protected springs, also known as ‘springs: protected’—SPs, consist of a concrete wall leading to a pipe that emits underground water into a stream)  The condition of this SP was atrocious.  Garbage filled the brownish, flooding water with flies swarming the area—the trash just baking in the scorching sun.  And that wasn’t even the most disturbing part.  As we were approaching the SP, the sun was blinding me and it wasn’t until we walked closer that I realized who primary fetched this dirty water—children.  Giggling and playing in this stinky mess were about 10-15 children between the ages of 2-10. Each child was filling up their own family’s dirty yellow jerry can and helping one another lift the cans on their heads to deliver to their homes (usually they travel 1-3 km every day, same routine).  This happens every day—that is, if there is water.  Both wet and dry season are challenging in Bar-dege.  The wet season (right now) is difficult because the SP floods regularly, as I witnessed, and contaminates the clean ground water with the rain water, trash, animals, feces, everything.    And in the dry season, the ground water is very low and often will not even come out of the SP.  

  

 

Okay that is all for now, these days take so much out of me. I have so much I want to share, to talk about, to just try to wrap my mind around all the challenges here… but right now I really have no energy to even think. Bedtimeeeee:)

Changing my topic back to water has led me on quite an interesting adventure.  Yesterday I traveled by myself for 8 hours on a hot, sticky, bumpy overcrowded bus to northern Uganda to the district of Gulu.  I came here for a few days to check out the area and meet with some NGOs to see if I want to research here for the next 6 weeks. During the northern Ugandan war, 90% of Uganda’s population (nearly 2 million people) had been forced to relocate to internally displaced person(s) (IDPs) camps, beginning in 1986.  The districts most affected were Gulu, Kitgum, Amuru, and Pader.  After talking with Charlotte, my advisor, we decided Gulu would be an interesting place because the IDPs are now returning to what once were their homes (since the LRA has recently moved away from northern Uganda) and they find that basic survival needs like food security, clean water, sanitation, and shelter just are not available anymore.  So I am meeting with a French NGO tomorrow to see if I can do my practicum with them to see the next steps these communities need to take for longterm development.  

I was supposed to meet with this NGO today and then visit and interview IDPs in their camps tomorrow, yet the NGO rescheduled for tomorrow, so now I will be in Gulu until Monday or Tuesday.  One of the hardest adjustments of being in Uganda is doing everything on ‘african time’.  Scheduled appointments can end up starting 2 hours late, meetings get canceled last minute all of the time, phone reception is the worst, and theres a 50/50 chance of getting internet connection. You just gotta roll with things here.  I love the laidback Ugandan lifestyle, but it is definitely a huge adjustment. It’s nothing like America. My patience has been tested so many times on this trip..  Theres just no use in getting frustrated when going out to dinner ends up taking over 45 minutes to just order a drink and over 2 and a half hours waiting for the food to arrive to find out the order was completely wrong. In America, I always feel so rushed. We complain about having a 25 minute wait at restaurants when its busy and then bitch about the service or orders being a little wrong.  I’m so guilty of this, and being here has really made me appreciate the little things in America that I take for granted. This trip has helped me to relax, to enjoy where I am in that exact moment (like the long 3-4 hour dinners with our SIT group, those dinners made some of my favorite memories getting to know the other students, its so nice to just sit and converse without feeling rushed to get to the next destination. People here just love talking and relaxing and being with people they care about. Its awesome)

But anyways, I digress. I am LOVING everything about Gulu so far. People are very friendly and its not as crowded as Kampala, thank god.  I really am looking forward to researching and living here for 6 weeks.  I’m sad I won’t be by the other SIT students that I’ve grown close to, but it will be good for me to step out and meet some new people by myself.  Things for me just feel right in Gulu. The only obstacle is that the main languages used here are Luo and Acholi, not Luganda. So the past 3 weeks learning Luganda kinda seems like a waste. 

 I ate at the restaurant here last night by myself and met the sweetest hotel worker named Stella.  She is 20 years old and has been working there for awhile. She was so friendly and ended up ditching work today to take me around gulu to go shopping at the market. She said she told her manager that she needed to show me around quick, but we ended up being gone for hours haha. And she wants to take me out tonight and to her church tomorrow morning.  She said if she can ever come to Chicago, she wants me to set her up with a cute mazungu boy, any takers?

Only day 2 and I love Gulu.

It has been quite some time since ive updated this blog, (daddy and mims im updating it now just for you)!

A lot has happened since the rural homestay.  After our 3 week excursion to Rwanda and western Uganda, we came back to Kampala for 3 weeks to take Luganda language classes in the mornings and elective courses in the afternoons. We chose one out of three different electives related to health issues and development in Uganda: grassroots development, gender, or public health.  I decided to study Public Health and it turned out to be really interesting.  The first week we had lectures about the different health issues in Uganda, which were okay, kinda dull and a lot of the lectures were just reviews of information that Ive already learned.  But the second week I felt like a learned a lot because we went on many site visits the whole time and actually got to meet with doctors, patients, nurses, healers, etc.  We got to see health clinics, landfills, a recycling center, and meet traditional healers (a spiritualist and a bone setter).  Visiting the spiritualist and bone setter was so interesting. Over 60% of Ugandans use traditional healing as their primary source of health care, which I find so fascinating.  Many Ugandans use traditional healing because of affordability and accessibility, especially in rural areas throughout Uganda where going to the nearest health clinic or hospital is too far that many have no choice but to turn to healers.  Often patients spend entire days traveling to the nearest health center to find that medication/supplies are out of stock which discourages them to rely on the biomedical field altogether. Over the past month, I’ve seen so many traditional health centers so it was really cool to be able to actually meet and interview the healers.  

Okay so how indecisive can a person be?  I think I win.  This past week we have been getting ourselves prepared to begin our practicum/Independent study project (ISP).  This consists of each student choosing a topic of interest that relates to the development in Uganda to research for the last 6 weeks of the program (and we can pretty much go anywhere in uganda that we want).  Initially, I was set on researching access to clean water and sanitation within rural areas throughout Uganda.  Last semester I took a class on global health and learned about the water crisis in developing countries so I was so set on this, even before I got to Uganda.  

Yet of course I changed my mind.  Learning about traditional healing was so interesting to me that I wanted to switch topics.  I researched a little on my own to write my practicum/ISP proposal.  I even interviewed with the NGO, THETA, whose objective is to build a strong relationship between traditional healing practitioners and biomedical practitioners within Uganda. The organization focuses specifically on training traditional healers in order for them to gain more legitimacy within their communities by teaching them proper, sanitary techniques and educating them when to refer patients to the health clinic/hospital, especially for blood testing for HIV/AIDS.  I met with a worker there named Moses who was totally willing to have me work through them to do my research.  It would have worked out perfectly…yet I just got this weird, uneasy sinking feeling in my gut. Something just didn’t feel right.

I don’t know how, but this past Tuesday I just knew I wasn’t supposed to be researching traditional healing.  I was so frustrated with myself. A couple days before our ISP starts and I want to switch back to researching water... Why does everything in my life always have to feel so uncertain?  I change my mind so much on so many things….but for the first time in a long time, I was certain that I needed to switch.  

If something like this would have happened to be before studying abroad, I definitely think I would have kept quiet and stuck it out with researching on traditional healing.  But I think so far studying abroad in Uganda  has forced me to grow up a lot and make decisions based on what I want.…when usually I think I just go with the flow…maybe a little too much.  Studying abroad has also definitely made me question every little thing in my life. Its frustrating, I feel very uncertain but way too many things, but I finally realized its helping me grow and that I just need to trust my faith and trust my instincts.  

Anyways…It would have seemed like too much of a hassle to switch topics again and have to rush to write another proposal, and pretty much just have to start from the beginning.  But I knew something in me just didn’t feel right about traditional healing.  Its so interesting, but I went with my gut feeling and switched back to water. AND I COULDN’T BE ANY HAPPIER. I am so thankful that I met with my advisor to switch topics, even though it was SO last minute. 

I walked into Charlotte’s office (my advisor) on Tuesday and told her how I was just feeling so lost and frustrated. She was so understanding and willing to work with me at quickly changing my topic back to water, I couldn’t thank her enough. She was like, “okay…first things first. We are not going to freak out over this, you are gonna figure this out”. Cassie and chrissy if you are reading this, you know exactly what state of freakout mode I was in…not pretty.  

But after a very frustrating week of feeling very lost and confused, I figured it out and am now finally feeling certain in where I am :)   

YAY CLEAN WATER FOR ALL:)